A different brain

I was out at a karaoke bar recently and someone sang ‘What It’s Like’ by Everlast. This somewhat cheesy, quintessentially 90’s song came out when I was a teen, and I’ve always known all the words but somehow I’ve never really heard them before. Or maybe it’s that, being older and having a bit of experience in the world, I can identify with them in a way a 16 year old cant. Because, hearing them sung, off key and in a cracked voice by a tipsy stranger, was somehow as if actually listening to the words for the first time, and I almost wanted to cry.

What could have changed in my brain to cause this song I’ve heard a thousand times before and never really thought about, to suddenly have an emotional effect on me?

Brains… are strange…

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Finally editing

Enough with short stories! I’m finally getting some momentum on editing my longer works and moving toward them being ready to submit somewhere. My optimistic goal is to have both my novel and novella ready to send places before winter is over.

Very optimistic, I know…

Hi Friends

You are awesome, even when you feel alone or sad or in pain. Don’t let fear stop you from reaching out to a friend for a conversation when you need one. The person you reach out to just might need to talk themselves, too…

Life isn’t easy. Life often sucks. You don’t have to force a smile and play pretend when you feel like giving up. Let someone know. More people care about you than you think.

And when someone pings you on whatever messenger with a simple hello or ‘hey what’s up?’ remember that they might be in need of friendship just as much as you are on your worst days.

There are hands around you waiting to be grasped. You don’t have to float through life alone.

Infinities

The idea of dying, and being gone forever, never existing again, is scary. But the idea of always existing, forever, with no end no matter what you do, is pretty horrible too.

Maybe humans fear/are repelled by ideas of the infinite because everything we know is finite. Would experiencing something infinite relieve that fear? Maybe, but how to do that…

Everyone is a skeleton inside

Sometimes I see someone with a certain head shape and become very conscious of their skull moving around beneath their flesh. What strange bags of meat and bone we are.

Everything that makes you you, is electricity flashing in a few pounds of water and fat, balancing precariously on a pedestal of collagen and calcium.

Maybe the way we decorate our soft machines shouldn’t be so important…

Late night thoughts

Somewhere, there is a tree growing which will some day be cut down and made into your coffin.

No one will ever truly know you, but you.

The person you love most in the world has secrets they will take to their grave, kept even from you.

The things people do for love, when done for any other object or reason, are called either addiction or mental illness.

Eating dead animal parts is really weird if you think about it too much.

You have no choice but to believe in free will.

You won’t remember reading this post a few years from now. How is that different than never having read it?

 

Motivation

Is so very hard to find sometimes. There is no clear path to success, no obvious next step. Everything must be done with the high likelihood that it is a complete waste of energy and time.

I sometimes feel like I’m in a vacuum. That, or one tiny voice in a howling hurricane made of other people.

Will anyone notice if I stop? Does anyone know I’ve started?

Okay, that’s enough melancholy for the week…